So You Want to Avoid Awkward Conversations

It’s that time of year again.

Families are gathering together.  Christmas can be a wonderful chance to catch up with relatives you don’t see as often as you’d prefer. But sometimes awkward questions about what you are or are not doing with your life wiggle down the table and take root next to the mashed potatoes and dinner rolls. 😉

A more traditional OTOH post is coming on Thursday. Today I thought I’d share some youtube videos to distract all but the most persistant “why aren’t you..?” and “you shoulds!”

The Barking Cat:

Baby Rap:

Emerson and the Scary Nose:

How to Make a Baby Stop Crying:

How UPS Deliveries Actually Work (this one has a few bleeped out curse words):

 

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Suggestion Saturday: December 24, 2011

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

Here is this week’s list of blog posts, photographs, comic strips, short stories and other tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

Gifts for the Baby.  I’ve always assumed the gold, frankincense, and myrrh were either used as forms of currency or sold to generate funds. Can anyone confirm this?

Mysterious Paper Sculptures. Ok, which one of you has been leaving ornate paper sculptures at the Scottish Poetry Library? 😀

100 Most Beautiful Words in the English Language. We should find more ways to include these words in everyday speech.

Ancient Graffiti. It turns out that graffiti from a few thousand years ago is not that different from what one stumbles across today.

From The Fir Tree:

Out in the woods stood a nice little Fir Tree. The place he had was a very good one: the sun shone on him: as to fresh air, there was enough of that, and round him grew many large-sized comrades, pines as well as firs. But the little Fir wanted so very much to be a grown-up tree.

I’ve never understood how this story became so popular. It has such a gloomy ending!

What have you been reading?

 

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Forgotten Heroes: Charles Loring Brace

Forgotten Heroes is a series of posts about extraordinary men and women who are (probably) not remembered by the average person.  Previous heroes include  Laura Secord,  Elijah McCoy and Nellie Bly.

If you know of a forgotten hero who should be included in this series let me know about him or her in the comment section or via the contact form

Time: 1853

Place: New York City

160 years ago the types of social services currently available for families in crisis in North America either didn’t exist or were in their most embryonic form. Tens of thousands of orphaned, abandoned, or extremely poor children, some as young as five or six, roamed the streets of New York alone.

For years the “solution” to this problem was to send stray children to prison or almshouses where they slept and ate next to adults who in many cases were alcoholics, violent criminals, or severely mentally ill. It was, in short, a horrifically inappropriate place for a child.

Charles Loring Brace had a different plan: foster care. In 1853 he founded the Children’s Aid Society and soon began sending older children to live with new families. Most were preteens or teenagers (because host families preferred older kids, especially if the family lived on a farm and needed help with the chores) but some were as young as six.

Many kids were actually placed right in New York City, perhaps even in the same neighbourhood they had lived in previously. Others travelled by the dozens by train to rural communities. In each small town the children were lined up and eventually, hopefully taken home by someone.

Theoretically prospective families were screened by the town minister or physician before being allowed to take one or more children home. In practice, though, nearly anyone who wanted a child from the orphan train could take one.

Some families were looking for free labour. Others were hoping to have what we would think of as an adoption – the children they took home were treated with the same affection that would be given to a biological son or daughter.

Were the orphan trains a success?

Yes. Children had the option of ending the placement if they weren’t happy. And given the other options – prostitution, working for starvation wages in a factory, joining a street gang –  taking a chance on a new family was often their best shot at a better life. At least two orphan train kids, John Brady and Andrew Burke, grew up to become successful politicians who cited their good experiences with foster families as a turning point in their lives. Between 1853 and 1929 about a quarter of a million kids were placed into new homes through this (and other similar) programs.

No. Other children were placed with families who neglected or abused them or who were really only in it for the free labour. There was little to no effort put into screening out families with less-than-pure motives and most placements did not last until the child became an adult. Sibling groups were often split up. Some kids should never have been included in this program in the first place – they already had loving families who never consented to this arrangement.

It’s ridiculously easy to judge the mistakes that were made by the Children’s Aid Society but Charles created this program with the best of intentions.  There’s a reason why he is considered the father of the modern day foster care system – he wanted to give these kids a second chance in life at a time when most people didn’t think they were worth the trouble.

Can a system that is still be improved upon today still be considered a force for good?

I’d say yes.

Interested in reading more about Charles Loring Brace and the orphan trains? Click here.

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They Don’t Belong Here

It was a cold, windy afternoon.

While checking out some library books I heard a conversation heating up:

“… and they could have bedbugs.” The woman anxiously jerked her grey curls to three men reading in the corner surrounded by their tattered backpacks and faded grocery bags.

“Everyone is welcome here,” the clerk replied.

“But bedbugs jump! Someone could be infected just by walking by them.”

“I can’t ask them to leave just because they have a few bags.”

“Well, how are you going to keep the books safe? Vancouver has had serious issues with bedbugs hiding in their library books. They’ve even had to shut down some of their facilities.” [note: I have no idea if this is true by any stretch of the imagination.]

“We vacuum and clean the library regularly.”

“That isn’t enough! There are other community centres they can use. They don’t need to stay here…”

To be honest, I had sympathy for everyone involved here:

  •  The clerk for being forced to entertain such a bizarre request.
  •  The disheveled men for once again being stereotyped and rejected.
  •  And even the woman who made the complaint. It must be exhausting to live with that much anxiety.

Respond

Anyone old enough to read this has no doubt had his or her own share of interesting encounters in public spaces. Come tell us about them in the comment section.

 

 

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Suggestion Saturday: December 17, 2011

Here is this week’s list of blog posts, comic strips, videos and other tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

Below the Line: Portraits of American Poverty. There are far more than a thousands words in these pictures.

Horror for the Holidays. Have you ever heard of a Krampus before?

From Only Stupid People Never Change Their Minds:

We inherently want to be right. We have the desire to be correct. To prove we’re smart. To show that we “know things”.

But that inability to see things from another perspective. That little something inside that refuses to be “wrong” – it will forever hold you back

#2654. There is some logic in this.

From Quashing the Self-Improvement Urge:

What if instead, we learned to be happy with ourselves?

What would happen?

Would we stop striving to improve? Would that be horrible, if we were just content and didn’t need to better ourselves every minute of every week?

I haven’t read anything spectacular this week. What have you been reading?

 

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Why Food Drives Are a Terrible Idea

All across America, charitable organizations and the food industry have set up mechanisms through which emergency food providers can get their hands on surplus food for a nominal handling charge. Katherina Rosqueta, executive director of the Center for High Impact Philanthropy at the University of Pennsylvania, explains that food providers can get what they need for “pennies on the dollar.”…

A lot of waste also occurs on the other side of the food-donation equation. Rosqueta observes that a surprisingly large proportion of food—as much as 50 percent—provided to needy families in basic boxes winds up going uneaten. When you go to the grocery store, after all, you don’t come home with a random assortment of stuff. You buy food that you like, that you know how to prepare, and that your family is willing to eat.

– Why Food Drives Are a Terrible Idea

Let’s talk about this.

If you’ve ever received food from a food bank or similar nonprofit group: what did you think of the selection of products? Was there anything you never used? If anyone in your household had/has a special diet (e.g. they had diabetes or food allergies, ate Kosher, were vegetarian/vegan, etc.) was the nonprofit group able to accomodate that?

If you’ve ever participated in a food drive: What was that experience like? Did you follow up to see if the group you donated to needed more help after the holidays? Have you ever been asked to give money instead?

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2011 Holiday Season Questions

Here are my favourite search log queries from the last few months. 

1. Why do today’s laundry products pollute the air and smell so bad? The ingredients have changed.

2. How has [the] Internet changed flirting? No idea.  I haven’t flirted with anyone in a very long time.

3. What does the name Bruxy mean? According to Urban Dictionary it doesn’t have a meaning yet.

4. How do people treat homeless people? Like they don’t exist.

5. Do quiet people get married? Yes. Sometimes they even marry one another!

6. Why is atheism rising in [the] U.S.? I don’t know. I wonder, though, if the percentage is rising at least in part because more people are able to be honest about this part of their lives without risking their jobs, marriages, etc.

7. Was life better before the Internet? Not in the least. I’m not saying it’s perfect but life would be much more lonely and isolating for many of us without it.

8. Am I rude if I’m 30 minutes late? Yes, excruciatingly (barring emergencies, of course.)

9. Why do people think quiet people are stupid? I’ve never known anyone who thinks that. Maybe it’s because they confuse having thoughts with sharing them?

10. What religion had a holiday on October 20, 2011? Judaism.

11. Do you at times enjoy debating for the fun of it? Hell no. I don’t even like being around other people debating for the “fun” of it.

12. Why are there so many negative people in the world? It’s easier for many of us to focus on what has gone wrong rather than what is going right.

13. How should Christians react to sticky situations? As politely as they’d want to be treated if the roles were reversed.

14. How to discuss politics with those on the other side? See #13 and #11.

15. What did Evelyn Waugh mean in his quote, “the human mind is inspired enough when it comes to inventing horrors; it is when it tries to invent a heaven that it shows itself cloddish.” Thought a) human beings are dumb. Thought b) See #12. Thought c) Horrors of every shape, size and colour can be recorded at this very moment. No one can say the same thing about what may or may not happen after death.

16. Makeup: reasons why to wear it? You enjoy putting it on. You like the way you look with it.

17. Paintings of Star Trek crew. Is this close enough?

18. Do quiet people ever have best friends? Yes.

19. Whatever happened to respect your elders? More and more people are realizing that it’s an overrated concept.

20. Are you a crabby Christian? No.

 

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Suggestion Saturday: December 10, 2011

Here is this week’s list of photographs, blog posts and other tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

Ice and Snow Festival. Photographs of massive ice and snow sculptures in Harbin, Heilongjiang.

I Really Love Christmas Now That I’m an Atheist. I really wish I could say the same thing. Spending time with loved ones and eating a great meal becomes more appealing every year but it’s still overshadowed by how grouchy and short-tempered many people are in public. It sucks the joy out of December for me. 🙁

From Science as Magic:

Magic makes impossibility fun and amusing. It creates a zone where you can expect to be mistaken about how things work, and just as easily return to normal once you leave that zone. We wouldn’t want all our lives to mystify and confuse us, but being stupefied for an hour or so seems to be just fine.

 

Hero from Miguel Endara on Vimeo.

Habibi is a unique story I’ve been having trouble condensing into a few short sentences. It’s about the lives of and intense bond between two child slaves, Dodola and Zam, who live in the middle east.

What have you been reading?

 

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Doomed to Repeat It

There’s a small stack of 2011 moleskin agendas sitting in the corner. Someone I know was planning to throw them away. It was such a waste of paper that I brought them home with me instead to be used as scrap paper.

These things don’t just magically appear in our world, after all – someone has to chop down the trees, turn their pulp into paper, bind the paper into agendas, design an eye-pleasing cover, ship the agendas to a warehouse and then to the store, unpack the boxes, make price tags, merchandise them, and then (hopefully) sell them.

That’s a lot of work!

As soon as the words, “I’ll take them,” dribbled out of my mouth I realized something:

I’m becoming my grandparents.

This isn’t a bad thing. They’re wonderful people. I’d just never thought about how many of their values I’d absorbed growing up.

My mother’s parents don’t waste a drop of anything. They used rotary phones until I was nearly out of high school. (And I’m pretty sure at least of of their phones still is a rotary.)  No one wastes food under their roof and inedible food scraps are fed to the barn cats. If you ever were to visit them and wanted to write a note they have a desk full of scraps of paper. Years ago when my parents needed  extra suitcases for a longer vacation than we’d taken before my grandfather dug some out of one of his storage rooms. They were forty or fifty years old but still worked great.

There are many differences between them and me but in this area we agree 100%.

Respond

I know I’m not the only who has caught myself acting like someone I know.

When was the last time you caught yourself doing or saying something that sounded just like something one of your loved ones would have done?

 

 

 

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Taoist Horror Movies

Believe it or not this phrase was a recent search term that lead someone to On the Other Hand.

It’s one of those terms that sticks with you. I’d never thought about what a Taoist horror movie would look like or even wondered if there was such a thing.

What makes a movie Taoist? Does a throwaway reference to Taoism count? What about any movie set in China that references ancestor spirits? Sometimes that’s about all that is used in North American horror movies when Christianity is dragged into the plot. It’s not surprising that there are films out there that do the same thing with other religious or philosophical beliefs. I just wonder where the line between Taoist horror movie and horror movie with vague references to Taoism is or should be drawn.

Time for some Internet research.

So it turns out that there (might be) such a thing as a Taoist horror movie :

Xiong Bang

Fei Taugh Mo Neuih

Shuang Tong

Wu Long Tian Shi Zhao Ji Gui

Or at least these are films that employ certain Taoist principles and ideas. I haven’t watched them so cannot say if they’re about as “Taoist” as a ghost story involving a priest and a crucifix could be said to be “Christian.” 😉

Respond

Have you seen any of these films? What did you think of them? Where do you draw the line between [noun] horror movie and horror movie that references [noun]?

 

 

 

 

 

 

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