Author Archives: lydias

About lydias

I'm a sci-fi writer who loves lifting weights and hates eating Brussels sprouts.
April 28, 2016 · 10:27 am

How to Be a Good Apartment Neighbour

So you’ve moved into an apartment building or complex. Congratulations on your new, environmentally-friendly home! There are a few things the people living underneath, beside, and/or on top of you would like you to know about this kind of living arrangement.

  1. If there is a communal laundry room, empty your machines as soon as possible. Your clothing will start to smell like mildew in your quiet, dark closet just as quickly as it would if you let it sit in the same washing machine for days on end.
  2. Do you feel like juggling bowling balls in your living room? Fantastic! Please save your juggling practices for the daylight hours, though. They’ll make the same delightfully raucous noise in the middle of the day as they would at 10 pm, and they’ll be much less likely to irritate the people living below you then.
  3. Open a window if your overcooked dinner sets your home fire alarm off. If you open your front door, the smoke will drift into the hallway and set off the main fire alarm. When the main fire alarm goes off it will loudly blare into every single apartment in the complex until the fire truck arrives. This is the sort of thing that should only happen when there is an actual fire spreading from one apartment to the next. See also: The Boy Who Cried Wolf.
  4. Speaking of fire alarms, smoking cigarettes also sets them off. Yes, this still counts if you open a window or sneak a cigarette in the emergency staircase. Be sure your sin smoke will find you out.
  5. Please tell me how your dog has learned to identify the floor he lives on by sniffing the elevator door. I am fascinated every time I see him figure out exactly when you will be disembarking and barking his approval of it.
  6. If you allow a canvasser to slip behind you into the building, we’re sending him or her to your house.
  7. Let the preschoolers press the ground floor button on the elevator. It will make their day.

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April 27, 2016 · 7:47 am

Croaked

This is the story of a young girl who finds a dead frog and decides to bring it back to life. It’s one of the strangest and most creative short films I’ve seen in a long time. To be honest, I still don’t know what to make of it, although I did love the ending.

What did you think of it?

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April 25, 2016 · 9:00 am

Why You Don’t Have to Respect Your Elders

This post was originally published in October of 2011.

Respect your elders!

We’ve all heard this.

But why should anyone be afforded more (or less) respect because of something as out of our control as the date and time we entered this world?

If I told you Bob is 60 years old and Susanna is 15 could you tell me which one of these people is kinder? more compassionate? wiser? more loving?

Yes, sometimes people do grow wiser with age but it isn’t an automatic process.

I’ve known “Bobs” (both male and female) who lived the same year over and over again, never applying lessons learned from one day to the next. There have also been “Susannas” who tumble out of childhood with more wisdom and common sense than most people three or four times their age.

Story Time

Drew and I spent a week visiting my parents and siblings a few summers ago when our nephew, Aiden, was a toddler. At the end of the visit I asked for a hug. He said no. Our last visit had been when Aiden was an infant and it was completely understandable that he’d be a little shy. These things happen when families are geographically scattered.

I also couldn’t imagine pushing this issue simply because I happened to be a couple of decades older. Being a child doesn’t mean that one has to do everything adults want. Yes, there are times when Aiden’s parents made and make decisions that he isn’t developmentally ready to take responsibility for yet but even a toddler is still his or her own person.

And a funny thing happened a few minutes later: he leaned over and gave me a hug after all.

Respect

…is for everyone: the Prime Minister, the homeless person sitting on the corner, your 88 year old grandmother and your two year old son or daughter all deserve a basic level of respect simply because they are fellow human beings.

It makes no sense to withhold this basic respect (or dribble out more of it) based on how old someone is or what has happened in their life so far.

…is earned. But, yes, respect is also something we can earn more of based on what we do and how we treat others.

Someone who is courteous, kind and generous is almost always going to be more respected and well-liked by those around them than someone who who is rude, selfish and cruel.

…cannot be demanded. In fact, demanding that someone respect you (outside of a rare handful of situations) is one of the fastest ways to lose it. It would be like walking up to a significant other, close family member or friend and saying, “I demand that you love me!”

Whatever emotions or behaviours that are dredged up may give the appearance of love or respect but you can never attract the real thing through force.

Am I saying that we should disrespect our elders?

No.

But don’t let something as out of our control as age determine who deserves your respect.

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April 23, 2016 · 1:00 am

Suggestion Saturday: April 23, 2016

Here is this week’s list of tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

Ruth Coker Burks, the cemetery angel. Someone needs to make a movie out of this story.

Devil’s Food Cake and White Lies via LindaKSienkwicz. I’ve never had this dilemma. Have any of my readers?

When a Fear Demands to be Faced via MaryannePope. I have had moments like this, though.

Why It’s Important to Filter What We See, Read, and Accept Into Our Lives via happy seriously. One of the reasons why I avoid advertisements as much as I possibly can is so that I don’t have these kinds of thoughts.

In a Perpetual Present. What an interesting case.

From I Was an Men’s Right’s Activist:

Later, I discovered I suffer from clinical depression. There’s lot of literature on how socially extremist groups — such as men’s rights or white supremacy — exploit young men whose lives are in turmoil, their beliefs in conflict. Spreading Misandry was a recruitment piece and I was an easy target.

From What Happened to Wildlife When Chernobyl Drove Humans Out? It Thrived:

In fact, this study demonstrates that, regardless of potential radiation effects on individual animals, the Chernobyl exclusion zone supports a thriving and abundant mammal community despite nearly three decades of chronic radiation exposure.

What have you been reading?

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April 22, 2016 · 1:07 pm

Earth According to Rocks

I almost never blog on Fridays, but I wanted to share this short film with my readers in honour of Earth Day.

It follows the adventures of a few sentient rocks who watch the Earth change over many millennia. I absolutely loved the storytelling in it, especially once humans began showing up.

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April 21, 2016 · 11:20 am

We Need Smarter Characters

One of the things that bothers me the most about modern fiction – especially when it comes to the horror and science fiction genres – is how little common sense and intelligence many characters seem to have in these stories.

Those of you who have known me for a few years might have heard me comment on this problem before, especially when The Walking Dead or Fear the Walking Dead are currently airing. I’m an intermittent fan of both of those shows. While I love their premises, the characters in them sure do make a lot of questionable decisions about who to trust and how to behave when they’re in immediate danger. At times that makes them extremely difficult to watch.

No, I don’t expect perfection from fictional characters anymore than I would from living, breathing people. There is definitely something to be said for showing exactly what happens to people when they make the wrong decision. You can learn a lot about someone based on how they react to things going horribly wrong in their lives.

There does come a point, though, when it’s hard to emotionally connect to someone who keeps making nonsensical choices. If there is a herd of zombies wandering around in the woods outside of your home, you really shouldn’t be going for a nature walk alone. If that new person you just met makes your skin crawl,  don’t ignore that feeling and tell him where you live when he asks.

These are the kinds of things that pull me out of the plot. If the protagonists were children or had unusual backstories to explain their naiveté, I’d completely understand. When seemingly normal adult characters do it over and over again in a violent and unpredictable setting, I start losing sympathy for them.

I’ve learned valuable lessons from my mistakes. Why don’t these characters apply the things the experienced in previous seasons to what’s currently going on with them?

What originally attracted me to these genres were the questions they asked about life. A good horror story peels back all of the social niceties to expose the grey underbelly of what frightened people the most in a specific era. Who do they trust? Who or what keeps popping up as the villain? You can learn a lot about a society based on who and what it fears!

Well-written science fiction asks questions that many people don’t otherwise think about. What does it mean to be human? How do we know if we can trust our governments? What kind of life might exist on other planets? What would happen if….?

These questions only work, though, if the characters that could ask them are aware enough to actually bring them to the audience’s mind.

Have you noticed this problem in the books you read or the shows you watch? Who are some of the smartest characters you’ve found recently?

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April 18, 2016 · 1:00 am

How to Make Shy People Come and Talk to You

Monday Blogs Photo

Photo credit: isthattheguy.

Someone found this blog over the weekend by doing a search for how to make shy people come and talk to you. I thought it would make a great subject for today’s post as I’m shy in real life until I’ve gotten to know someone pretty well.

Take your pet for a walk. I often find it difficult to start conversations with strangers or acquaintances, but that hesitancy disappears when there’s an animal in the mix.  I virtually never touch them due how terribly allergic I am to cats and dogs, but I sure do enjoy seeing a happy, healthy little creature out and about with their human. Telling someone that their pet is gorgeous, smart, or well trained is a great ice breaker.

Compliment them. Speaking of compliments, people often welcome them as well. I generally praise what someone has created – a book; a song; a clever joke; a beautifully decorated cupcake – instead of stuff they only have some control over such as their appearance. There’s less of a chance of them taking that compliment the wrong way. Also, everyone has at least one talent if you search long enough.

Ask open ended questions. For example, what are you looking forward to this summer? That kind of question can be interpreted as specifically or generally as someone wants. They could talk about that blockbuster they can’t wait to see or they could mention something far more personal if they chose. I usually like talking about stuff that isn’t your typical small talk, but I also appreciate having the option of keeping things lighthearted and non-specific if I choose.

Talk about what you love. I’m never going to be the kind of person who enjoys watching sporting events or drinking beer, but I still get a kick out of hearing why other people find that stuff so entertaining. You can learn a lot about someone by listening to them talk about their passions and interests.

Be kind. I find it much easier to open up and chat with kind people. We might not talk about a lot the first time they talk to me, but the second and third conversations can be much longer and more interesting if I walk away with a good first impression of them. I really dislike it when people try to pull me out of my shell the first time they meet me. If they let our interactions evolve naturally instead, they’ll get much more out of me in the future. From what I’ve observed of other shy people, I suspect that a lot of them are the same way.

Now I want to hear what’s worked for you! Let me know in the comments.

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April 16, 2016 · 1:00 am

Suggestion Saturday: April 16, 2016

Here is this week’s list of tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

Crowd Source. I didn’t know this was so widespread. Did you?

Libertaria! A Choose Your Own Short Adventure via NinjaTheory22. This was incredibly well done.

Be Careful Who You Friend Online via TLHouchinauthor. Not only am I careful who I friend online, I’m also careful about what I share in general. There are certain things about your life that really shouldn’t be broadcast to just anyone.

Oh, Traitorous Nose! via cheryl_cch. I found this horrifying and hilarious at the same time.

What We Love About Our Moms. Mother’s Day is coming up shortly. This was such a warm and funny reminder of everything that great moms do. I really loved it, and I hope you do as well.

From What I Learned About Bias From 4 Years Working at McDonald’s:

I realized this attitude was way grosser than shoveling fries. Because I am not better than a McDonald’s worker.

Sure, maybe I have different skills. I have no muscles and I fluster under that kind of pressure. I’m always going to be better at desk jobs than labor jobs. But this is not because I’m more intelligent or more skilled or worth more than a great McDonald’s employee.

What have you been reading?

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April 14, 2016 · 7:16 am

How Do You Market Your Books?

i-beg-your-pardon-excuse-me-frog-sweet-large Sometimes I give my readers advice. Today, though, I’m asking you for advice.

This isn’t only for other authors. I’m also interested in hearing from musicians, graphic designers, comedians, speakers, llama whisperers*, and anyone else who sells some kind of product or talent.

How do you market your stuff? What have you found effective? What techniques have you not found helpful at all?

I’m all ears!

*This should totally be a real occupation.

 

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April 13, 2016 · 8:36 am

Blind Man Attempts to Describe Vision

What I found fascinating about this video is that you could have the same kind of conversation about all kinds of topics:

  • The taste of peanut butter to someone living with a severe peanut allergy.
  • A phobia to someone who has never been irrationally afraid of anything.
  • How social media works to someone who lived and died ten thousand years ago.

There are some things that are extremely difficult to explain to people who have no framework with which to understand them.

These are the kinds of things I think about when I’m sitting quietly in the corner. Aren’t they interesting?

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