2012 Questions

Almost all of us have made a New Year’s resolution at least once.

This year I’m asking New Year’s questions instead:

  • When and why did people first start making resolutions on New Year’s eve?
  • What do lychee taste like?
  • Does the Mayan calendar end on December 21 because the world is going to end or because someone forgot to finish their assignment a few centuries ago? 😉
  • Can you make a dairy-free version of flan?
  • Is hiking more enjoyable when you add extra people?
  • What was daily life like for the average person in Europe a thousand years ago?

And probably many other questions I’ve yet to think of.

2012 is going to be a year of curiosity for me, though. There’s so much out there I haven’t learned yet!

Respond

Have you made a New Year’s resolution? What questions will you be asking in 2012?

 

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4 Ways to Be Kind to Yourself

December wasn’t an easy month for me. To be honest by the end of it I’d grown pretty grouchy and wavered between feeling guilty for letting stress affect me so much and bristling against the forced cheerfulness of the season.

Sometimes, this process can be very subconscious. We won’t know why we’re being mean or angry or greedy or jealous—we’ll just do it.

From 4 Ways to Be Kind When You Don’t Feel Like It.

I loved this blog post so much I thought I’d write a companion article to it. Sometimes it can be as difficult to be kind to yourself as it is to be kind to others.

Here are a few things that have helped me over the last several weeks:

1. H.A.L.T. Are you feeling hungry, angry, lonely or tired? It’s amazing how much low blood sugar, fatigue or interpersonal problems inflate a small problem into a huge one.

2. Say no. You don’t have to accept every invitation or continue all of the traditions you participated in before. I won’t lie – you may ruffle a few feathers in the process. But there’s nothing wrong with saying “no, thanks!” to something you’ve really been dreading.

3. Ask for help. Need a sympathetic ear? Advice from someone who has been through the same thing? Practical assistance with chores or a special project? Something else? Ask for it! I’ve found that most people love to help out if they know what would (or would not) be appreciated.

4. Recharge. You might need to do this more than usual after a particularly stressful event or period.

 

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Suggestion Saturday: December 31, 2011

Happy New Year’s Eve!

Here is this week’s list of blog posts, quotes, documentaries, short stories and other tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

New Year’s Day:  Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions.  Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.  ~Mark Twain

Chocolate: a Complete Beginner’s Guide. Who would have guessed there were so many steps to the process of making it?

‘Tis the Season. Cleaning out your closet? This link is full of good advice on what clothing should and should not be donated to homeless shelters, used clothing stores and other charities.

Nana and Betty. It’s amazing how much can be forgotten about the life of one person after just a couple of generations. I wonder if it will become easier to track down what actually happened to people in 50 or 100 years (assuming that we still have the Internet and that the records are preserved!)

The complete lyrics to Auld Lang Syne. I, for one, will be singing the entire thing tonight. 😉

From A Saturday Story:

I’m not sure if this will work, but it might be fun to try. We’re going to tell a story.

I’ll start, then we’ll take turns continuing from there in comments. Whoever goes next adds a sentence or two and together we’ll find out where the story goes from there.

 

What have you been reading?

 

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The Upside of Being a Hypocrite

Confession:

I participated in a gift exchange this year.

No, I still don’t celebrate Christmas (unless baking chocolate chip cookies somehow counts!)

It was with a small group of people. Bowing out was not something that could have gone unnoticed.

And I didn’t want to be the different one again. Too often I say no to:

  • homemade treats (stupid allergies),
  • church services,
  • get-togethers when I’ve made other plans…

After a while you don’t want to bow out any longer. So I said yes.  The amount we were to spend was small enough that a dollop of creativity was required to come up with a good gift and it was gratifying to figure out what would appeal the most to the recipient in that price range.

Will I do it again next year? No idea.

What I do know is that there’s nothing wrong with changing your mind or bending the rules. Just because something – a label, a belief system, a hunch, a way of doing things- worked really well last time doesn’t mean it will continue to do so tomorrow, next year, or in 2042. And that’s ok.

 

 

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So You Want to Avoid Awkward Conversations

It’s that time of year again.

Families are gathering together.  Christmas can be a wonderful chance to catch up with relatives you don’t see as often as you’d prefer. But sometimes awkward questions about what you are or are not doing with your life wiggle down the table and take root next to the mashed potatoes and dinner rolls. 😉

A more traditional OTOH post is coming on Thursday. Today I thought I’d share some youtube videos to distract all but the most persistant “why aren’t you..?” and “you shoulds!”

The Barking Cat:

Baby Rap:

Emerson and the Scary Nose:

How to Make a Baby Stop Crying:

How UPS Deliveries Actually Work (this one has a few bleeped out curse words):

 

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Suggestion Saturday: December 24, 2011

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

Here is this week’s list of blog posts, photographs, comic strips, short stories and other tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

Gifts for the Baby.  I’ve always assumed the gold, frankincense, and myrrh were either used as forms of currency or sold to generate funds. Can anyone confirm this?

Mysterious Paper Sculptures. Ok, which one of you has been leaving ornate paper sculptures at the Scottish Poetry Library? 😀

100 Most Beautiful Words in the English Language. We should find more ways to include these words in everyday speech.

Ancient Graffiti. It turns out that graffiti from a few thousand years ago is not that different from what one stumbles across today.

From The Fir Tree:

Out in the woods stood a nice little Fir Tree. The place he had was a very good one: the sun shone on him: as to fresh air, there was enough of that, and round him grew many large-sized comrades, pines as well as firs. But the little Fir wanted so very much to be a grown-up tree.

I’ve never understood how this story became so popular. It has such a gloomy ending!

What have you been reading?

 

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Forgotten Heroes: Charles Loring Brace

Forgotten Heroes is a series of posts about extraordinary men and women who are (probably) not remembered by the average person.  Previous heroes include  Laura Secord,  Elijah McCoy and Nellie Bly.

If you know of a forgotten hero who should be included in this series let me know about him or her in the comment section or via the contact form

Time: 1853

Place: New York City

160 years ago the types of social services currently available for families in crisis in North America either didn’t exist or were in their most embryonic form. Tens of thousands of orphaned, abandoned, or extremely poor children, some as young as five or six, roamed the streets of New York alone.

For years the “solution” to this problem was to send stray children to prison or almshouses where they slept and ate next to adults who in many cases were alcoholics, violent criminals, or severely mentally ill. It was, in short, a horrifically inappropriate place for a child.

Charles Loring Brace had a different plan: foster care. In 1853 he founded the Children’s Aid Society and soon began sending older children to live with new families. Most were preteens or teenagers (because host families preferred older kids, especially if the family lived on a farm and needed help with the chores) but some were as young as six.

Many kids were actually placed right in New York City, perhaps even in the same neighbourhood they had lived in previously. Others travelled by the dozens by train to rural communities. In each small town the children were lined up and eventually, hopefully taken home by someone.

Theoretically prospective families were screened by the town minister or physician before being allowed to take one or more children home. In practice, though, nearly anyone who wanted a child from the orphan train could take one.

Some families were looking for free labour. Others were hoping to have what we would think of as an adoption – the children they took home were treated with the same affection that would be given to a biological son or daughter.

Were the orphan trains a success?

Yes. Children had the option of ending the placement if they weren’t happy. And given the other options – prostitution, working for starvation wages in a factory, joining a street gang –  taking a chance on a new family was often their best shot at a better life. At least two orphan train kids, John Brady and Andrew Burke, grew up to become successful politicians who cited their good experiences with foster families as a turning point in their lives. Between 1853 and 1929 about a quarter of a million kids were placed into new homes through this (and other similar) programs.

No. Other children were placed with families who neglected or abused them or who were really only in it for the free labour. There was little to no effort put into screening out families with less-than-pure motives and most placements did not last until the child became an adult. Sibling groups were often split up. Some kids should never have been included in this program in the first place – they already had loving families who never consented to this arrangement.

It’s ridiculously easy to judge the mistakes that were made by the Children’s Aid Society but Charles created this program with the best of intentions.  There’s a reason why he is considered the father of the modern day foster care system – he wanted to give these kids a second chance in life at a time when most people didn’t think they were worth the trouble.

Can a system that is still be improved upon today still be considered a force for good?

I’d say yes.

Interested in reading more about Charles Loring Brace and the orphan trains? Click here.

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They Don’t Belong Here

It was a cold, windy afternoon.

While checking out some library books I heard a conversation heating up:

“… and they could have bedbugs.” The woman anxiously jerked her grey curls to three men reading in the corner surrounded by their tattered backpacks and faded grocery bags.

“Everyone is welcome here,” the clerk replied.

“But bedbugs jump! Someone could be infected just by walking by them.”

“I can’t ask them to leave just because they have a few bags.”

“Well, how are you going to keep the books safe? Vancouver has had serious issues with bedbugs hiding in their library books. They’ve even had to shut down some of their facilities.” [note: I have no idea if this is true by any stretch of the imagination.]

“We vacuum and clean the library regularly.”

“That isn’t enough! There are other community centres they can use. They don’t need to stay here…”

To be honest, I had sympathy for everyone involved here:

  •  The clerk for being forced to entertain such a bizarre request.
  •  The disheveled men for once again being stereotyped and rejected.
  •  And even the woman who made the complaint. It must be exhausting to live with that much anxiety.

Respond

Anyone old enough to read this has no doubt had his or her own share of interesting encounters in public spaces. Come tell us about them in the comment section.

 

 

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Suggestion Saturday: December 17, 2011

Here is this week’s list of blog posts, comic strips, videos and other tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

Below the Line: Portraits of American Poverty. There are far more than a thousands words in these pictures.

Horror for the Holidays. Have you ever heard of a Krampus before?

From Only Stupid People Never Change Their Minds:

We inherently want to be right. We have the desire to be correct. To prove we’re smart. To show that we “know things”.

But that inability to see things from another perspective. That little something inside that refuses to be “wrong” – it will forever hold you back

#2654. There is some logic in this.

From Quashing the Self-Improvement Urge:

What if instead, we learned to be happy with ourselves?

What would happen?

Would we stop striving to improve? Would that be horrible, if we were just content and didn’t need to better ourselves every minute of every week?

I haven’t read anything spectacular this week. What have you been reading?

 

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Why Food Drives Are a Terrible Idea

All across America, charitable organizations and the food industry have set up mechanisms through which emergency food providers can get their hands on surplus food for a nominal handling charge. Katherina Rosqueta, executive director of the Center for High Impact Philanthropy at the University of Pennsylvania, explains that food providers can get what they need for “pennies on the dollar.”…

A lot of waste also occurs on the other side of the food-donation equation. Rosqueta observes that a surprisingly large proportion of food—as much as 50 percent—provided to needy families in basic boxes winds up going uneaten. When you go to the grocery store, after all, you don’t come home with a random assortment of stuff. You buy food that you like, that you know how to prepare, and that your family is willing to eat.

– Why Food Drives Are a Terrible Idea

Let’s talk about this.

If you’ve ever received food from a food bank or similar nonprofit group: what did you think of the selection of products? Was there anything you never used? If anyone in your household had/has a special diet (e.g. they had diabetes or food allergies, ate Kosher, were vegetarian/vegan, etc.) was the nonprofit group able to accomodate that?

If you’ve ever participated in a food drive: What was that experience like? Did you follow up to see if the group you donated to needed more help after the holidays? Have you ever been asked to give money instead?

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