Lydia Schoch

Photo by ColKorn1982.

Procrastination has been something I’ve struggled with for a long time. It was something I started doing for a long list of reasons: perfectionism; not wanting to be embarrassed by something that wasn’t quite right; worrying about what other people would say about what I’d finished.

I’m slowly getting better with it. Ten or fifteen years ago I fell into it much more quickly and spent way more time getting out of it.

Now I’ve condensed the entire process into a week or two instead of months on end.

One of the things that has really helped me as I work on this is the idea of one scary thing.

Almost anything can be broken into a series of steps: open an email, make a phone call, read a document.

The trick is to focus on only one of those steps at a time.

All I have to do today is complete one step. I set an alarm ahead of time. When the timer dings days or weeks later, I work quickly to finish that step and only that step. Tomorrow is a chance to tackle the next one. There’s no need to do it right now until I have a strong urge the finish the whole thing right now.  This rarely happens, but I take advantage of it when it does.

The amazing thing is how often it works. Of course I still have times when there are setbacks, but I’ve seen a lot of personal growth in this area recently.

What habits are you currently working to correct? What works best for you while trying to change them?

This is a short film about two bugs who help a clumsy caterpillar get into her cocoon.

It has background music but no (human) dialogue. You can watch it with the sound turned off, although I really enjoyed hearing the bugs grumble and mutter in their insect language.

This story made me think of all of the ways people try to help each other. While I definitely have the occasional snarky moment after a brusque encounter with someone who was rude or unkind, I also believe that most of us are good most of the time.

The main characters in this film seem to agree with me on this point. I loved seeing them do what they could to make their world a slightly better place. Don’t let the animation fool you – this is written for adults more than it is for kids. In fact, I wouldn’t recommend it for very young children at all. It’s really not something that was ever created for them, as cute as the bugs themselves may be.

Oh, and the ending was absolutely fantastic. I can’t say anything about it without giving away spoilers, but be sure to stick around for it. It was well worth the six minute investment.

What do you think? Are people naturally good? Why does everyone seem to think that animated films are always meant for children? How annoyed are you when someone shares spoilers before you get a chance to watch or read something?

Here is this week’s list of blog posts, poems, comic strips, and other tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

The Black Knight’s Deed via brudberg. Read this aloud to get the full effect of the rhyme scheme.

Is therapy worth it? Seven personal stories about the price of mental health. This is fascinating.

My Eulogy via SwiftInkEditor. Too funny.

Spring. You’ll (probably) never guess the twist here, but I still don’t want to give away spoilers. Go check it out for yourself.

Damage. An essay about how one woman’s life was changed by female genital mutilation. It’s graphic, so don’t click on the link if you’re easily disturbed.

The Dunning-Kruger Effect: Are the Stupid Too Stupid to Realize They’re Stupid? via CrossExamined. It wouldn’t surprise me if this were true. From what I’ve observed, intelligent people are much more likely to be aware of their own shortcomings.

What have you been reading?

What it is:

Those who make compassion an essential part of their lives find the joy of life. Kindness deepens the spirit and produces rewards that cannot be completely explained in words. It is an experience more powerful than words. To become acquainted with kindness one must be prepared to learn new things and feel new feelings. Kindness is more than a philosophy of the mind. It is a philosophy of the spirit.—Robert J. Furey

“That best portion of a good man’s life; His little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and of love.”—William Wordsworth 

It doesn’t involve:

• Ignoring your own needs. 
• Allowing others to make decisions for you.
• Being afraid to say no.

It’s simply about paying attention and helping people when you can and how you can.

Taking care of your mental health is just as important as taking care of your physical health. Here’s why.

If I ever wrote a self-help book, the entire gist of it would fit into one page.

Be a critic.

Be talented.

Be a coffee snob.

Be a talented critic.

Be a devout Atheist.

Be a weekend warrior.

Be an incorrigibly skeptical Christian.

Be a couch potato the other five days of the week.

Be a hipster, but only when you can pull it off ironically.

Be one of those weird people who regularly strikes up a conversation with the person sitting next to you on the subway.

Be one of those even weirder people who enjoys talking to strangers on the subway. Lean in and ask questions to keep the conversation rolling when someone comments on your cute dog.

Be anything you want to be.

Just be nice about it.

What does being nice mean?

I’ll tell you on Thursday. 😉

Here is this week’s list of blog posts, poems, and other tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

In Defense of Snow via KillarneyTray. #8 on this list should include all of the hot drinks that feel so good this time of year. Tea. Coffee. Hot chocolate.

When Cops Break Bad: Albuquerque’s Police Force Gone Wild. There is something seriously wrong with this.

50 Shades of Blogs Everyone Should Follow via RobertHughes05. I’m still working my way through this list. Did anything on it catch your eye?

Northern Lights: Do the Scandinavians Really Have It All Figured Out? Scandinavia sounds like a great place to live.

The Real Personality Types Made Relevant via Thelittlebod. I’m either an Idealist or an Egghead. What are you?

From Antilamentation:

Regret nothing. Not the cruel novels you read
to the end just to find out who killed the cook, not
the insipid movies that made you cry in the dark,

What have you been reading?

Photo by Keven Law.

Many of my online friends have been dealing with serious problems lately. They’re the kind of issues that can’t be fixed easily. In some cases, they can’t be fixed at all.

I know what it’s like to receive unwanted, unhelpful advice during a very difficult time.

It’s so much nicer when other people stifle that urge and just sit with you through it, whether it’s in person or through private messages online.

That doesn’t mean it’s an easy thing to do. The empathetic urge to do something to help is strong.

This is where the happy part of the Internet becomes important. There’s something soothing about looking at pictures of cute animals or trying to figure out the meaning of a photoshopped picture. (You wouldn’t believe how much time I spent trying to figure out if unicorn llamas were a symbol for something I hadn’t heard of yet. As far as I know, they aren’t).

Sometimes the Internet is a nice place.

Sometimes it’s hopeful.

Sometimes it gives you weird glimpses into other people’s minds.

Sometimes it’s retro.

Unicorn llama via Amberbunting.

Where do you go when you need to find the happy part of the Internet?

This is really interesting.

Family Day is Ontario’s newest statutory holiday. We’re still figuring out how to observe it as a province as it’s only been around since 2007.

Most of the businesses that advertise special discounts or events for it concentrates on families with young children.

I’m hoping that this will evolve over time. Family Day is for everyone.

• Single parents and their kid(s).
• People who have one child.
• People who have a dozen children.
• Families whose kids are older or completely grown up.
• Couples who never want to have children.
• Couples who definitely do.
• People who consider their pets part of the family.
• Chosen families

Today I’m imagining what it would be like if more types of families were included in the advertisements of this holiday. Maybe there could be wine tastings, dog park parties, special performances at nursing homes, or dance competitions.

Here’s hoping.