Suggestion Saturday: May 19, 2012

Here is this week’s list of blog posts, photos, recipes, videos and other tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

From Things I Once Believed Were True:

When I was little, I asked my mom why people hated hippies. (Right after asking her what a hippie was.) She replied: “Well, people thought they were dirty, and that they slept around.”

Having no knowledge of euphemisms at such a tender age, I naturally assumed that “sleeping around” meant a person who would wake up in the morning, then go into their living room and take a nap.

Mommy, Where Do LEGO Babies Come From? Fun fact: my parents used to joke that they’d only had sex three times – once for each kid. In other news apparently Mr. and Ms. Lego had a really, really good time recently.

Rhubarb Curd. I’ve never posted a recipe on Suggestion Saturday before but this one looks incredible for those of you who aren’t vegan or allergic to milk. To be honest I don’t remember well what any dairy products taste like these days (and I enjoy not having a scarily swollen face just a little to much to remind my taste buds  😉 ), but I think yogurt is somewhat sweet? If you try it let us know what you think!

Why Should Religion Get a Free Ride? If you aren’t following Greta Christina’s blog yet you’re missing out. She posts such thought-provoking material. I have no interest in deconverting theists but I agree that the same standards should apply to everyone. Either it’s appropriate to try to talk everyone/anyone out of their (ir)religious beliefs or it isn’t.  What general-you identifies as is irrelevant.

But What About the Aliens? President Obama can neither confirm nor deny the existence of aliens.

This week’s book recommendation: The Scrapbook of Frankie Pratt. It follows the young adulthood of a flapper and looks like a real scrapbook – lots of pictures and souvenirs, just a few words. I found Frankie to be a little too 2012 in certain ways* given that she was born in the early 1900s and lived a pretty sheltered childhood but it was still a fantastic read.

What have you been reading?

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The Problem With Moving Away

Photo by Dave Morris

Seven years ago I moved 350 miles away from the small town where I spent the second half of my childhood.

This was something I started thinking about almost as soon as we moved there. It wasn’t a dangerous or terrible place to live by any means…I was just never very good at small town life. I like being able to go to the grocery store without running into anyone I know, to never be asked why I don’t share a last name with my husband, go to church or have kids.

I love the anonymity and creativity of Toronto.  Here I’m surrounded by people who, even if they don’t share my proclivities, genuinely don’t care what it is I do (or believe) so long as I’m not harming anyone else against their will.

This. Is. Amazing. 10, 15 years ago I had no idea I’d end up with this kind of freedom.

But…

Then I go home for a visit. The town I grew up in hasn’t changed very much. Many of the people I grew up with still live there or in similar places elsewhere in the midwest.

Most of my non-traditional (for lack of a better term) friends have also moved away. I grok why this happens. If I moved back now I’d either have to be really, really quiet about huge swaths of my life or pull a Bruce Gerenscer and be the brunt of a delightful mixture of pity, scorn and failed conversion attempts. 😉

After my recent trip back home, though, I wonder if small towns don’t need more Bruce Gerenscers.

Does he perplex people?

Yes.

Does he aggravate them?

Yes.

Does he make them think?

Hell yes.

I don’t really do that on a daily basis. City-dwellers are surrounded by so many different points of view that it’s more difficult for them to assume that everyone agrees with their beliefs. It’s hard to surprise them.

As much as I love this sometimes I think it’s better if us “shocking” people stay put. It’s much easier to dislike a label than it is to dislike a neighbour, family member, or friend.

There’s real value in being the only X in town, in putting a human face on a mistrusted minority group.

I just don’t want to do it personally.

Respond

What have been your experiences as the odd one out in your community? Why did you move away? Why did you stay?

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Suggestion Saturday: May 12, 2012

Here is this week’s list of blog posts, charts, world photography days and other tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

What are you doing on Tuesday, May 15? I’m going to be participating in Aday.org. On the 15th millions of people across the world will be taking a photograph of something in their lives and sharing it with everyone else. Click on the link for more information.

Yes, I’ll share my photo here as well. I hope you’ll share yours, too!

The Body Odd. It took me longer than normal to learn the difference between right and left. I don’t remember how old I was when it finally happened but I do remember feeling relieved that I finally got it.

10 Easy Ways to Lower Your Lifespan. Just in case you were hoping to die a little sooner. 😉

From Why Your Kid Isn’t Creative:

There’s nothing new about the way pragmatic concerns and conformity displace playfulness and originality as kids mature. “Every child is an artist,” Pablo Picasso once said. “The problem is how to remain an artist once we grow up.”

What’s Your Life-Ruining Secret? These aren’t exactly secrets for people who know me well but here’s my list of Stuff That Freaks (Some) People Out: bisexual, humanist, (theoretically) polyamorous, agnostic, childless by choice. What’s your list?

Today and Tomorrow. A fantastic post from my friend ‘Seph about circular reasoning.

Love, InshAllah is a collection of essays about the love lives of Muslim women. There are arranged marriages, virgin brides, LGBT revelations, and women who found lasting love the third time around. Everything else I’ve read about Muslim women has tended to portray them as victims or as superhumanly pious. It’s fascinating to see a glimpse of the lives of ordinary people.

What have you been reading?

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A World Without Sea Cucumbers

A few weeks ago an unusual search term prompted me to write this post.

A few days ago someone found this blog by doing an Internet search for a world without sea cucumbers

Strawberry has a story for you, anonymous visitor. I’ve heard it’s been passed down among sea cucumbers for generations. 😉

In the beginning the world was very different than it is now.

You could swim as far as your fins or flippers wanted to move and you’d never find the beginning or end of the sea.

You could swim as far up or down as your fins or flippers soared and you’d never scrape the muddy floor or gasp those peculiar gases that stream over the sea.

There was only water as far as anyone could ever swim. If there was, in fact, anyone around to swim.

The sea was much less crowded in those days. There were other creatures- small, rounder, and less intelligent than us – mucking about but there were no sea cucumbers.

And then the seas split. Structures that looked like reefs jutted up out of the sea, some so enormous that they ruptured one sea into two. The water surged, growing shallow in places where it had been deep and deep where it had been shallow.

Everyone living near those reefs died. How could anyone survive without water, after all?Those left behind adapted to new habitats, learning to eat new foods and find shelter behind rocks or underneath mud on an otherwise barren ocean floor.

The best of these stretched out their tails, sucked in their bellies, absorbed their limb buds and became sea cucumbers. It took many generations for them to become as intelligent and curious as us, of course, but they eventually made it.

And that is how a world without sea cucumbers became a world with them.

 

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Suggestion Saturday: May 5, 2012

Here is this week’s list of blog posts, pictures, videos and other tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

Dangerous Booby Traps Found on Popular Utah Trail. This is unbelievable. I’m so glad no one was injured by this foolishness.

The Baby Producer. It’s amazing to watch a small child (re)interpret his surroundings. I don’t know how they make sense of it all so quickly.

What’s Keeping You From Volunteering? Such an interesting post. I completely understand all of the reasons listed there. This is why I usually only volunteer online for organizations that are very flexible about time.

Everyone Sees What You Appear to Be. I don’t actually agree with this one. Or at least not over the long term. It’s easy to fool someone for an hour or day…but eventually the real you is going to seep through. Whether or not this is a good thing depends on what sort of person you are I suppose.

I recently finished One Big Happy Family, a collection of essays about families that don’t fit the traditional mold. It includes essays on open adoption, homeschooling, single parenthood, polyamory, same-sex couples, sperm donors, househusbands, and interracial/intercultural marriages.

If I ever own a house large enough to throw a decent party in I’ll invite every single one of these writers and their families over for dinner. I’ll invite you, too. After the table is cleared we’ll have a nice, long conversation over dessert and the drink of your choice. I suspect we’ll be pleasantly surprised to see how much we share in common. And if this doesn’t happen at least you’ll get a free meal out of it. 😛

What have you been reading?

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Open Thread: What Do You Want?

Yes, I will be releasing another official survey for On the Other Hand’s two year anniversary this summer. It will be so interesting to compare the results from last year!

In the meantime what topics would you like me to cover here? Is there anything I’ve blogged about that you really enjoyed?

I’ve settled nicely into that review-writing gig I mentioned last month and may be able to commit more time to this site in the near future.

 

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Wild Card Wednesday: A Story in the Making

There is a short story encapsulated here.

Can you visualize the end?

(In my version he walks away from the collision with a few bruises and scratches. Hopefully that is what happened in real life as well!)

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Mailbag #6

It’s been a while since I’ve been able to update this series.  Thank you to whomever it was who thought up this question. Lurkers, please don’t be shy. I’m happy to answer anything!

Recently anonymous asked:

 What are your most strongly held beliefs?

1. Politics are useless. By that I mean that it doesn’t really matter who you vote for or which party wins. There’s only so much change that can be accomplished on a federal level.

2. It’s better to tell a story than preach a sermon. But never combine the two. You’ll only end up with the worst of both worlds.

3. A friend shared this quote with me a few years ago when I was horribly stressed out due to a series of unhappy surprises: everything will be ok in the end. If it’s not ok it’s not the end.

4.  Every beer brewed since the beginning of mankind is terminally un-drinkable. Except for this one.

5. Give others the benefit of the doubt. Sometimes they don’t know that what they’re asking or assuming is offensive. Sometimes things don’t come out the way they were intended. That’s ok. Take a step back and clarify before deciding how to proceed with them in the future.

Do you have a question for me? Submit it through the contact form or in the comment section of this post. 

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Suggestion Saturday: April 28, 2012

Here is this week’s list of blog posts, slide shows and other tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

From Melting Glaciers Liberate Ancient Microbes:

With that ice melting at an alarming rate, those conditions could soon be at hand. Masses of bacteria and other microbes – some of which the world hasn’t seen since the Middle Pleistocene, a previous period of major climate change about 750,000 years ago – will make their way back into the environment.

@Loveszar retweeted a great Deepak Chopra quote last week: When the caterpillar thought it was the end of the world it turned into a butterfly.

People Riding Animals Other Than Horses. My favourite was the shark.

All It Takes is a Smile. I’m so oblivious to flirtation that I have no idea how I got married. (Well, ok. I might have some idea of how that happened. 😉 ) At least I’m not the only one, though.

24 Things You Might be Saying Wrong. I wonder how long it will take for these phrases to replace the old (correct) versions of them? Language does evolve after all.

Sex. Marriage. Attraction. Lust. Romance. Our understanding of these terms have shifted tremendously over the past few hundred years. There have always been people who are attracted to the opposite sex, of course, but it is only within the last 150 years that heterosexuality was created as a cultural identity.

Straight tells you exactly how that happened.

What have you been reading?

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3 Things I’ve Learned as a Book Critic

Lajos Tihanyi’s The Critic.

About a month ago I began writing book reviews under a pseudonym for another website.

It’s been an amazing experience so far. I love combing through the review database and finding short stories and books to read. It’s exhilarating to discover new authors and even a new genre – I’m just now realizing how much I love a well-written mystery. In the past it’s always been a section of the library or bookstore that I’d overlooked.

Here are a few things I’ve learned from my first month of reviewing:

Be kind. It’s so easy to be snarky. (Or at least it is for me ;)). I’ve learned that there are many ways to effectively review a short story or novel that stirs up mixed emotions – you loved X but had reservations about Y, you don’t understand why Z happened.

Tone matters. What might come across as a light-hearted jab or playful phrase in real life can be interpreted in a much harsher light when you only have the written word. I try to sandwich even strong criticisms between praise for this reason.

Be honest. Of course sugar-coating your opinions doesn’t work either. Some stories are  more interesting or well-written that others.  There are polite ways to get this across but it isn’t helpful to pretend to enjoy something that you actually disliked.

And not liking something doesn’t mean that it’s a bad book! I refuse to read sentimental stories. I have a friend who hates science fiction and another friend who cannot stomach sexually explicit romance novels. Asking any of us to give an honest critique of these genres would be foolish. We’d have so little to recommend about them.

Be compassionate. Someday someone will (hopefully) review the short stories and book I’ve been working on. As excited as I am to share some of these things with the outside world later on in 2012 I’m also nervous. Will others like my work? Will they understand my sense of humour?

I hope that the people who review my stories remember that they were written by another human being and that I put weeks, months, or years of effort into what they’re reading. In the meantime I try to catch glimpses of the authors behind the stuff I review.

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