Lydia Schoch

Last night I attended a free lecture that was given by a local scientist who has dedicated a few decades of his life to studying Alzheimer’s disease.

The lecture itself was excellent. A distant relative of mine had this disease at a time when there were no treatments for it at all. We helplessly watched her fade away over the course of many years, so it was wonderful to hear that families who are dealing with this diagnosis  in 2016 actually have a few drugs and other treatments to slow down the progression of it.

There is even an experimental surgical treatment now that has reversed some of the brain damage in a few patients.

The most surprising thing about this lecture, though, was that it was interrupted every five minutes by a man who said things like:

“Well, I don’t believe that study,” when the presenter showed us a graph indicating that the percentage of people diagnosed with Alzheimer’s has been slowly dropping over the years as the general health of the population has improved.

“People get this disease because they eat too much sugary, GMO food.”

“But how do you know for sure that the plaques in the brain aren’t the body’s way of fighting off germs? Maybe Alzheimer’s is nothing but an over-reaction to bacteria!”

There were times when I had to stare at the floor and gently bite my bottom lip to avoid a fit of giggles. No, I wasn’t laughing at the man himself. He obviously wasn’t good at picking up on social cues, understanding how the scientific process works, or engaging in a logical, two-way conversation.

I had empathy for him even while wishing that he’d stop interrupting so that the speaker could go back to explaining how boosting acetylcholine levels has been shown to have a mildly positive effect on people who have this disease. It isn’t a cure, but it is a small piece of the puzzle. I would have loved to hear more about it.

Unfortunately – or fortunately, depending on how you look at it –  the whole situation felt like we’d all slid into the opening scene of a bad science fiction novel where an ordinary person fiddles around in their basement on the weekends until they develop a cure for a disease that baffles scientists. Little did that person realize, though, that the cure was far worse than the disease itself.

The writerly portion of my brain was churning out ideas like a fiend. Would the scientist who was so rudely interrupted in the opening scene turn out to be the person who saved the world after the protagonist messed everything up? That would sure be a refreshing twist on how these tales usually go.

When was the last time that your imagination was sparked by something unusual around you?

I first want to thank Lydia Schoch for allowing me unleash the plague of my thoughts upon the airwaves of this blog. You should all be afraid. Today I want to talk about chasing your dreams and really going after what you want. This can be one of the most soul crushing things you can ever do. It can in time be one of the most rewarding as well.

When I first started my journey I received many of the typical reactions that you get when you chase after something that seems impossible. Many people offered words of support with the caveat that many people fail at doing the same thing. Some said outright that I would never succeed. There was not a single offer of help. It is like all of my friends and family expected me to fail. At least I would get a participation ribbon to say I tried.

When I did need help it came from strangers. The wonderful writers who had been through this torment before. Whenever I had a question about writing or story structure or outlining, it was their words that helped to inspire and improve upon what I was doing. These magical pixie dust spewing angels knew what I was going through. They were the most supportive while my friends and family would downplay the torment that is writing a work of fiction.

Nothing in life comes easy. There are always bumps in the road, but don’t let those become unpassable moats of despair filled with crocodiles that have rockets strapped to their backs. You must persevere. This is why I have written many blog posts about staying positive and being happy. It is difficult to maintain a positive attitude when it seems like everything is falling apart in front of your eyes. My first draft was a disaster. Quite possibly the worst thing I have ever written {never mind the My Little Pony superhero mashup I wrote… wait, how did YOU know about it???). I could have given up right then.

Instead I resolved to work harder. Gradually with each draft the novel improved. Then one day while working on the 3rd draft I realized that the novel wasn’t bad. It wasn’t good, but it had some parts that were enjoyable. That one moment of encouragement was like getting a drop of water in space where no one can hear you thirst. While working on my 5th draft I finally felt like my precious word-baby was almost ready to be kicked out into the world.

Every time someone says you can’t do it tell yourself you can. Every time something seems impossible tell yourself that you can. Every time someone says your dinner is burning laugh at them and tell them that you don’t have time to cook until you have slayed the demon! Actually, you might want to make sure your house isn’t burning down. The bottom line is that even if you fail to reach where you want to go on your first attempt, you can always try again. We’ve used the Contra Code. You have 30 dream chasing lives. The only people who truly fail are the ones who quit and also the ones that get stomped by Godzilla. There’s no coming back from that.

Brian Basham is an American author, blogger, and social media shenanigangster. He enjoys playing Texas Hold ’Em poker tournaments, putting together complex Lego sets, making small plastic items with his 3D printer, playing softball, and watching his beloved football team in Washington. He lives in Virginia Beach. 

His collection of prequel stories to his first novel titled Virtual Wars: Booting Up is now available for pre-order and scheduled to be released on 10/28/16.

If you would like to know more please visit his website at http://www.Brian-Basham.com.

Here is this week’s list of poems, essays, comic strips, short stories, and other tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

Wingless. This should be a full novel. Wow!

Everything Happens for a Reason. People may mean well when they use this phrase, but I’m glad to see I’m not the only one who doesn’t find it soothing.

Enigma via ‪Elspeth_Thomas‬. Remember this the next time you walk through a graveyard.

October Is a Teacher via brudberg‬. This isn’t the first time I’ve recommended one of Björn Rudberg’s poems on Suggestion Saturday. If you aren’t familiar with his work, definitely check out some of his other posts while you’re on his site. He’s fantastic.

24 Hours in Witch Country. It’s hard to tell you what this is about without giving away spoilers. It was quite the read, though.

Is Swearing Uncouth? via nzstelter‬. What a thought-provoking post.

What have you been reading?

Many people have the expectation that what they type, look at, watch, and share on a smart device is private. But privacy and the internet—especially social media platforms—has become a sticky situation for the legal profession. The belief that a tweet, a message, an email, even a visit to an internet site remains solely a personal concern isn’t a hard and fast line—and neither is it a guarantee that information on social media will be relevant and useable to a court case.

In generally, lawyers and judges are watching other court cases closely to see the results of individual questions related to social media privacy. Requests that are too broad have less of a chance of being held up than those that are very specific and also pursuant to the case.

To learn more about this ever-changing world of social media privacy, use the information in this graphic.

The Irony of Privacy Settings: Can Lawyers Use Social Media Posts in a Court of Law?

I had an unexpected moment of joy over the weekend.

My spouse and I were walking down the street. Suddenly, I noticed a little dog carrying a ball in her mouth and walking the opposite direction from us.

I grinned and quietly pointed her out to my spouse.We often point out cute dogs to each other. Luckily, Toronto is full of people who love sharing their lives with four-legged friends.

Her little body was alert and happy from nose to tail. I can’t quite remember if her tail was wagging, but she looked proud and happy to be carrying her toy around by herself.

The human walking with her paused for a moment before leading her across the street.

Were they going to the park to play fetch? Quite possibly.

She was moving with twice as much anticipation and pep as you’d expect to see in such a small body. This wasn’t at all the gait of a dog who has already burned off a lot of energy and wanted a nap.

Imagining all of the fun her and her human were about to have made me grin. I could clearly picture them running around on the grass together as a few more autumn leaves floated to the ground.

Maybe she even paused to chase a few squirrels? I’ve seen a lot of city dogs chase them, but the squirrels always seem to stay two steps ahead of the game.

I imagine that her human laughed for a minute before calling his little friend back to play some more fetch. When they were both worn out, I’d like to think that they went home for a cozy family nap.

The bond between a person and their pet can be like that sometimes.

Picturing all of these details made me smile. It’s so interesting to try to guess what other people’s (and animal’s!) lives are like after you lose sight of them. Half of it is a creative exercise for me as a writer. You can learn a lot about plotting a scene or writing about an interaction between two characters by seeing how real humans and animals behave.

The other half of the reason why I do it is because it’s just plain fun.

What small things have brought you joy lately?

Here is this week’s list of poems, comic strips, and other tidbits from my favourite corners of the web.

This is the time of year when I start thinking about candles a lot. Maybe it’s because the sun is setting so early these days that we have hours of darkness before bedtime?

Before the First Frost via jdubqca. I really liked how the title tied into what was going on in this poem. They complemented each other nicely.

A Thousand Little Weights. Yes, exactly.

Balancing Act via NancyERoman‬. Most of us are going to live long enough to become old. What happens after that largely depends on what you think being “old” should be like.

5 Take-Aways from the Presidential Debate via Dan_Salerno_‬. This was a good summary of the presidential debates in the U.S.

From Sex and World Peace:

In fact, the very best predictor of a state’s peacefulness is not its level of wealth, its level of democracy or its ethno-religious identity; the best predictor of a state’s peacefulness is how well its women are treated.

From Small Talk Should Be Banned – Here’s Why:

What is your relationship with God? What is something you fear in life? These may be great topics for conversations, but we rarely tackle such meaty topics at social gatherings….

This is a shame, because research has confirmed what most people know but don’t practise: surface level small talk does not build relationships and it is not great for our happiness levels.

What have you been reading?

Lately I’ve been getting a fair number of search engine hits from people looking for ways to skip out on Christmas altogether. I’ve also been getting visitors who want to celebrate this holiday without exchanging presents for it anymore.

In the past, I’ve blogged about alternative ways to celebrate Christmas if you’re only interested in bowing out of the gift exchanges.

What should you do if you want to stop celebrating it altogether, though? It can be harder to turn down an invitation for a meal, get-together, or festive performance than it is to say you’re simply bowing out of the present exchange. Sometimes people who love this holiday have a hard time understanding why anyone wouldn’t want to celebrate it.

With that being said, there are some reasons not to celebrate this holiday that are hard to argue with.

Travel

There have been times when my spouse and I travelled over the holidays. Some airlines have started to crack down on people bringing overstuffed or over-sized carry-on bags with them.

We’ve travelled with other airlines that have strict weight requirements for everything you bring with you. Going over those limits can be expensive, so you have to be careful about what you do and don’t pack.

The other nice thing about travelling is it nearly impossible to pressure someone into participating in a specific event when they’re hundreds or thousands of miles away at the time. At the very most, you might have time for a breezy conversation with them before returning to whatever agenda you’ve set for your day.

Grief

While grief isn’t one of the reasons why I don’t celebrate Christmas, I have known people who changed how they celebrated the holidays after the death of a loved one. In some cases, this can mean toning down those celebrations or even not having them at all.

No kind or reasonable person would guilt-trip someone into celebrating something that reminded them of such bittersweet memories.

Minimalism

This may be confirmation bias on my part, but I keep meeting more and more people who are interested in paring down their possessions and simplifying their lives.

Minimalism can be a great reason to cut back on all kinds of holiday stuff. Why not leave the Christmas decorating and event-planning to people who genuinely enjoy them?

It doesn’t make any sense to buy things you don’t like with money you should be spending elsewhere simply to impress people.

Nearly everyone understand what it’s like to feel tension between their values and what others think they should be doing. Framing the conversation this way can earn you supporters that you might not have otherwise had.

Religion

Christmas is a deeply religious holiday for many of my relatives. I’m planning to blog about some of those experiences later on this year, but it can be hard for my mind to tease out the difference between the kinds of Christmases I had growing up and the secular version of this holiday that some people knew.

They are tightly bound together in my mind.

It would be quite strange to insist on celebrating Eid with someone who wasn’t Muslim or Yule with someone who wasn’t Pagan, after all.

I see the religious celebration of Christmas as the same thing. It’s great for people who are part of that religion, and it’s fine if outsiders want to respectfully experience it as well. It is incredibly bizarre to pressure non-believers into celebrating a faith they don’t have, though.

No

Sometimes you don’t have to give a reason at all. While I generally do try to explain my decisions to people who ask, there are times when this doesn’t work so well.

“No” can be used as a full sentence if you’re having a conversation with someone who is going to pick apart any answer you give to them.

Respond

If you don’t celebrate Christmas any longer, how did you come to this decision? If you’ve never celebrated Christmas, what other holidays have you celebrated and how do you feel about them? If you’ve changed how you celebrate certain holidays, what kinds of changes have you made?

Close your eyes when you listen to this video.

It will be well worth it.