Hosted by That Artsy Reader Girl
Okay, so technically this week’s prompt was “favourite book quotes.” I tweaked it a little to become humorous book quotes because the world needs more laughter at the moment in my opinion.
1. “I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.”
― The Salmon of Doubt
2. “Reality continues to ruin my life.”
― The Complete Calvin and Hobbes
3. “Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some cave somewhere, with a sign on it saying ‘End-of-the-World Switch. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH’, the paint wouldn’t even have time to dry.”
― Thief of Time
4. “Begin at the beginning,” the King said, very gravely, “and go on till you come to the end: then stop.”
― Alice in Wonderland
5. “If you ever find yourself in the wrong story, leave.”
― Goldilocks and the Three Dinosaurs
6. “You deal with mythological stuff for a few years, you learn that paradises are usually places where you get killed.”
― The Battle of the Labyrinth
7. “Are you always a smartass?’
Nope. Sometimes I’m asleep.”
― Blood Rites
8.“If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.”
9.“We’ll never survive!”
“Nonsense. You’re only saying that because no one ever has.”
― The Princess Bride
10. “No sight so sad as that of a naughty child,” he began, “especially a naughty little girl. Do you know where the wicked go after death?”
“They go to hell,” was my ready and orthodox answer.
“And what is hell? Can you tell me that?”
“A pit full of fire.”
“And should you like to fall into that pit, and to be burning there for ever?”
“What must you do to avoid it?”
I deliberated a moment: my answer, when it did come was objectionable: “I must keep in good health and not die.”
― Jane Eyre
112 Responses to Top Ten Tuesday: Humorous Book Quotes
Hahaha great list! I love “If you ever find yourself in the wrong story, leave.” The Princess Bride and Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland are endlessly quotable, too, and I love that Blood Rites quote.
My favourite is the one about the family skeleton! Thanks for the smiles, Lydia.
Thanks for the laughs. I feel the Douglas Adams quote on a personal level!
Ah, brilliant quotes and they did the job of making me laugh! I now want to add all of these books onto my TBR because I have yet to read any of them 😅 Some of these are really so spot on 😂 Great picks!
Thank you very much!
Lovely! I forgot that Jane Eyre quote!
I’ve heard that first quote, about deadlines, before, but I hadn’t realised it was a Douglas Adams gem. I probably should have though, his books are so quotable!
Heh, they sure are.
This was a really nice list. It surely made me laugh especially number 3 the Terry Pratchett one. 😂
Hi there Lydia! I only have time and data for a few visits today and I am so glad that I’ve picked you! This was sooooo funny! I have to mark it to get back to it when the data situation is better. Or Wifi!
Great great job! But then again, you are great at all your posts.
I took an old one and just re-published as time and data are not on my side! At least we are having a wonderful holiday…
10 Favorite quotes from books
Oh, I feel honoured that I made your list of sites to visit! 🙂
I love these! The Douglas Adams quote is one I saved a long while back, and it still makes me giggle. I love the Jane Eyre and Jim Butcher quotes too!
omg I love all of these! lol love the one about the paint not having time to dry on the end of the world switch – pretty relevant these days!
Heh, it sure is.
“If you ever find yourself in the wrong story, leave.” I really appreciated that one today. I enjoyed many of the quotes you picked, but this one especially. Great list!
I feel like reality is ruining all of our lives right now. You couldn’t have picked a better quote these days.
Thank you very much.
Yes, we definitely need more humour right now!
My TTT: https://jjbookblog.wordpress.com/2020/09/29/top-ten-tuesday-283/
I’m glad you agree!
A list of humorous quotes wouldn’t be complete without Douglas Adams. 🙂
Totally agreed there!
Great topic choice, I love that Douglas Adams quote!
Love Jane Eyre! She’s the sass queen.
She truly is!
Lovely! All of your quotes had a bit of snark and sass. I’d no memory of the Jane Eyre quote, and finding something from GB Shaw is always wonderful. And let’s not get started on the deadline; my boss would love that too ;D
That Princess Bride quote made me smile. I am very fond of the movie and the book. Great picks!
Thanks a lot. 🙂
Some of these made me laugh (see Jim Butcher)!
Heh, that’s great.
All of these are awesome! Great list ♡
Thanks a lot.
Ah, that conversation in Jane Eyre is so perfect. A lovely list, as always!
It is pretty timeless. And thank you.
Terry Pratchett wrote some brilliant witty lines!
He sure did!
Ahh! Such good quotes. There are some favorites here. Thanks for bringing a smile to my face!
You’re very welcome.
These are all so great! The Watterson, and the Adams, and the Willems! Will definitely be adding these to my own notebook of quotes. 😀
Yay! And thanks.
Hehehehe, I love the thief of time quote XD
It’s pretty awesome for sure. 🙂
I mostly just got hung up on the book title Goldilocks and the Three Dinosaurs! I have to look that up now. 😀
Ha! Hope you like it.
Ha, several of these made me laugh.Great pics and happy Tuesday!
Thank you. So glad to hear that.
*picks, lol. It’s been a long day
No worries. 🙂
These are cute. I can’t do humor that well, but I appreciate those who can.
“If you ever find yourself in the wrong story, leave.”
― Mo Willems, Goldilocks and the Three Dinosaurs
Aw! Mo! Love it.
It’s pretty fantastic for sure.
I feel like almost every Douglas Adams line is a great quote. He was quite extraordinary.
I couldn’t agree with you more. He was one of a kind.
I love these, but #1 and #10 are my favourites. Being a lifelong procrastinator, I laughed so hard at the first one.
Heh, glad/sorry to hear you get that.
Yay! Harry Dresden!
The best! 🙂
Made me laugh, and today of all days I really needed a good laugh https://pmprescott.blogspot.com/2020/09/ttt-092920.html
So glad to hear it.
Oh, I love the spin you took on this one. And yes, they put a smile on my face so thanks! 🙂
So glad to hear that! Thanks.
I love that you did funny quotes. We definitely all need more smiles and laughs these days. Thanks for that!
You’re welcome. Happy TTT!
Great post! Really smiled at these. Loved the Percy Jackson one!
Thanks a lot.
That Douglas Adams one made me smile. 🙂
He had quite a way with words.
Lovely quotes. Yes, humorous but also thought-provoking. Thanks.
And thank you for visiting my TTT earlier.
You’re quite welcome. I’m glad you enjoyed my post.
Reality continues to ruin my life seems to encapsulate my world right now LOL!
Ha! I think we can all say the same thing.
These are all great quotes, but I especially love the Douglas Adams and the Princess Bride quotes! I’ve only seen the Princess Bride movie, I’ll have to check out the book sometime.
Oh, the book is fabulous! I definitely do recommend checking it out.
Love these! I’d encountered a few before, but it’s always nice to be reminded of how funny authors can be…dead or alive! 😀
Heh, for sure.
These are great! I especially loved the Blood Rites quote.
I’m glad you liked them.
Most excellent quote. Some I’ve heard. Others I’m memorizing now!
I love your take on this week’s topic! We could all definitely use some laughter right now…
Thank you very much!
Excellent take on this week’s theme! I agree, the world needs more humour, and I very much enjoyed these quotes. The last one was just the icing on the cake. 😀
So glad you enjoyed it!
Great list – I think we all forget how many slyly humorous quotes are in Jane Eyre, loved reading the one you picked!
Heh, for sure.
Love your take on this week’s topic. The quotes you selected all gave me such a great laugh, especially the one about deadlines whooshing by, lol.
Thank you very much!
Many of these did make me chuckle, thanks! I especially love the second one.
Glad to hear that.
Ahh so cute that you themed this! Such a great giggle.
Heh, thank you.
We do indeed need more laughter right now, so I appreciated these immensely! I adore Douglas Adams, so it’s wonderful seeing him right there at the top.
HAHAHA.. Yes, this was a great list!!! 🙂
Yay! I’m so glad.
The Princess Bride has so many great quotes! <3
It sure does. 🙂
The Princess Bride is so quotable.
Lol awesome quotes!!
Heh, thanks. 🙂
These are some awesome quotes! I especially love the Princess Bride and the Douglas Adams quotes!
So glad to hear that.
the eight one is awesome!! can imagine skeletons dancing. hahaha
Heh, I’m glad you enjoyed it.