I didn’t like Noah (the male love interest) at all in this story because of how unwilling he was to respect Allie’s boundaries when they first met, but I thought she was a sweet and lovely person. She deserved a partner who listened to her the first time she spoke her mind.
I would have dated either of these characters in a heartbeat if they were real people! Clare’s artistic occupation would have given us a lot to talk about on dates. Henry seemed like the sort of person who would have tons of interesting stories on date night…assuming he didn’t zap back to a different timeline in the middle of it.
Click here to read everyone else’s replies to this week’s question. The image below is the list of upcoming prompts for this blog hop.
While I don’t really celebrate any winter holidays with anything other than a nice meal, I still enjoy reading books about or set in this part of the year.
I’ve never seen such a diverse assortment of stories related to Christmas. The references to the horror genre in the blurb are particularly interesting.
I was obsessed with Mr. Andersen’s stories when I was a child. He was the person who introduced me to many of my favourite classic fairytales and legends!
This is a topic I thought would make a great introduction to the beginning of December and the holiday season that looms before us, but the information in it is timeless.
I’m using the phrase difficult people as a shorthand term for anyone you find challenging to socialize with because of their behaviour.
Labels are useful but can’t possibly explain every nuance in a relationship. Your relationship with a friend will probably have features that aren’t present with a coworker, romantic partner, in-law, neighbour, or acquaintance. It was my intention to cast a wide, friendly net for this post and try to offer advice that can be used for as many different scenarios as possible.
With those caveats out of the way, let’s talk about how mindfulness can help before, during, and after the moments when you’re spending time with someone who you are not sure how to relate to.
Beforehand
I’ll admit to being the sort of person who sometimes plays conversations out in my head before they happen.
The problem with this is that no one can predict the future.
That conversation might not ever actually happen. If it does happen, there’s no way to know in advance when it will pop up or if it will end the way you expect.
Spending as much time in the present moment as possible is a great way to avoid borrowing trouble.
One of the biggest benefits of mindfulness I’ve discovered for days like these is that it helps me to prepare for them without making assumptions about how they will go.
All you know for sure is that a certain event is on the horizon and that specific people are probably going to be there. Start with that.
During
Slow Down
There is something beautiful about intentionally moving slowly through these sorts of interactions.
Not every question or remark deserves an answer. If it does need to be answered, that could happen five minutes, or a week, or a month from now after you’ve had time to think it over.
Observe
I like looking at designs on silverware or counting lightbulbs in a room. There is always something to pay attention to that you might have otherwise ignored.
Reading body language is also a fascinating thing to do. You can learn so much about someone by quietly watching their posture, facial expressions, and gestures.
Breathe Deeply
The beautiful thing about breathing deeply is how it encourages your mind to remain in the moment and what a calming influence it can be.
Focus on every breath as it enters and exits your body. Sometimes I’ll even count them silently in my mind.
Choose Your Words Carefully
It can be so relaxing to sit there and make small talk about the weather or some other innocuous subject when a tricky topic comes up.
There’s also the option of saying nothing at all. Silence is truly golden sometimes. As I mentioned earlier, not everything requires a response now or ever.
A well-placed dose of silence can give you a moment to think of how you want your words to come out before you say them.
This is a technique I’ve found especially helpful for people who have the urge to swoop in and fix the lives of those around them regardless of whether or not you actually wanted those things to be fixed. If they don’t know you adopted a new dog from the local animal shelter, chances are very good they’ll never tell you all of the things you’re doing wrong with that pet or why the breed you chose is the worst one ever.
Afterwards
Be honest with yourself.
How did it go? What parts of this gathering did you enjoy? Which ones were not so helpful?
Release
I know it’s tempting, but mentally going over what anyone said or did at tricky events like these probably won’t be helpful.
As Elsa sang, let it go. Find something to take your mind off of what just happened. Taking a long, brisk walk through the park is a nice distraction for me when the weather is nice. Sometimes I even use that trick on stormy days! It’s hard to ruminate when you’re also trying to avoid slipping on a patch of ice or stepping into a large puddle.
Think Longterm.
The strategies I mentioned today have been helpful for me in the short term, but it’s also important to think about what you want your life to look like months, years, or decades from now in my opinion.
I believe in meeting people where they’re at and being understanding, compassionate, and supportive when they’re going through a difficult time.
But I also believe in natural consequences and in putting emotional energy into relationships that are healthy and reciprocal. The only person I can control is myself, so there have been times in my life when I’ve reduced or eliminated the time I spent with someone based on their behaviours and current level of introspection.
There’s a huge difference between using mindfulness to get through a difficult conversation that must happen and repeatedly agreeing to spend time with someone who chooses to be unkind… or worse.
It’s not my place to tell anyone how to arrange their lives, but I think there’s something to be said for finding both short-term and long-term strategies for dealing with these things.
This month I’m participating in the Scifi Month challenge that was created by the bloggers at One More.
“Science the shit out of this” is today’s theme for Scifi Month.
Old reruns of Star Trek: The Next Generation were my first introduction to technologies and scientific advancements that weren’t yet possible in our world. There were so many parts of that universe I desperately wanted to experience, from the holodecks to the replicators that would make you anything your heart desired for dinner. (It’s possible that 8-year-old me planned to eat nothing but replicated ice cream sundaes for dinner for a whole week if I ever got my hands on that technology!)
I’m still waiting for machines that are capable of these things. In the meantime, though, there are plenty of other science fiction advancements that have been or are becoming real in our world. Let’s talk about a few of them today.
Hyposprays
As someone who has been known to faint after getting a vaccination, I thought hyposprays would be less scary. Alas, my body is just as afraid of needle-less vaccines as it is of the other kind. This is still a cool development for making the workplace safer for doctors and nurses, though!
Medical Tricorders
Star Trek tricorders were used to almost instantly diagnose patients in their medical bay. With a quick scan, medical personnel could have vital scans as well as reports on anything that might be out of order in someone’s body.
Our tricorders aren’t quite as thorough yet, but some ER docs did invent a device a couple of years ago that can give readings on lung function, blood glucose, white blood cell count, and heart function. This device can diagnose about 30 different conditions with a few quick and painless readings.
Tractor Beams
The device these physicists came up with can reel in tiny particles for distances as long as eight inches. This technology is still in its infancy, but I’m excited to see how it develops in the future.
Artificial Wombs
No, I’m not talking about incubators. As life-saving as they are, they still aren’t capable of doing everything a uterus can do.
This is something that could change in the future. A couple of years ago, scientists put a premature lamb into an artificial womb. It had a pumpless circulatory system which is much easier on the lungs of an undeveloped fetus. They even created an amniotic fluid replacement so that the lamb would be in conditions as close to a normal ewe pregnancy as possible.
The lamb seemed to develop normally, so scientists are now working on creating an artificial womb that could bring premature human babies to full term with far fewer complications than they can experience with today’s methods.
What other items can you think of to add to this list?
Doesn’t this photo feel like it came from a scene in a fantasy novel? I will be talking about a fantasy series today so it does fit the theme of this post.
I don’t know if this is the right Corrie ten Boom book, but my parents owned a book written by her that talked about her childhood, experiences in concentration camps, and journey to forgiveness after the end of World War II. It was a heartbreaking read at times, but her stories about surviving those years made me a more empathetic person.
I was a few years older than the target age group for Harry Potter, but I loved them anyways. They were a wonderful distraction and a much-needed source of hope from a long struggle with childhood depression I dealt with shortly before the first book came out.
Reading this book helped me begin to sort out my thoughts when I worried about stuff that was either out of my control or not as serious as my brain was making it out to be.
This week’s prompt was a Thanksgiving freebie. Since I’ve already written a few different posts about the Canadian and American Thanksgivings over the last month, I decided to use this prompt to share books written by Native American and First Nations authors that I’ve already read or am I’m hoping to read soon.
If I’ve read it, I’ll share a sentence or two about why I liked it.
Generally, survival and adventure stories are a tad too intense for my tastes. This one began when two old women were abandoned by their village during a terrible winter famine. Where the plot went from there is why this has become one of my all-time things to read when I do want to read about adventure and survival.
This was my first introduction to Mr. Wagamese’s work. I’ve been a fan of his writing style and storytelling ever since. He has a way of making every scene come alive no matter what is happening in it. That is, his ordinary scenes are just as unforgettable as the heartbreaking ones.
What books can you all recommend adding to this list?
This month I’m participating in the Scifi Month challenge that was created by the bloggers at One More. Click on the link in that last sentence for more information or to sign up yourself. There is still time to pick a few of their prompts and join in if you’re interested.
The prompt for today was “aim to misbehave.” Science fiction is filled to the brim with characters who excel at getting into trouble, so I’m narrowing it down to protagonists (or people close to them) who were mischievous in a positive, humorous way. That is, they never got into the scrapes they do with the intention of harming anyone! It was all done in good fun.
Bender was high-tech industrial metalworking robot. Specifically, he was created to bend structural steel without heating it up first.
Let’s just say that the plan for this robot’s life wasn’t necessarily all that related to who he turned out to be after he left the factory where he was assembled.
Yes, Bender was physically capable of bending just about any physical object you can imagine, but what he was really interested in was bending the rules. Often, he bent them until they broke not out of malice but because he enjoyed seeing how life played out when things don’t go according to schedule.
Humans fascinated and horrified him. He thought he hated them until he met a few special people who changed his mind. Even with his humans of choice, though, he always wanted to know just how far he could push the limits while still making his antics funny.
Disenchantment is one of those shows that straddles the line between science fiction and fantasy, so I’m including it in this list. Luci is one of those demons that is far more good than he’d ever care to admit.
Like a cat, he has a strong desire for napping, independence, and not necessarily doing what the humans want him to. When push comes to shove, he’s going to land on the side of the good guys even if it means avoiding that sunbeam and not having that afternoon nap after all.
Just don’t expect him to avoid every mischievous temptation along the way. If there’s a way to get into the amusing kind of trouble while also helping his buddies, he’s going to find it.
Bart Simpson
The only reasonable conclusion I can make about The Simpsons is that it’s set in a science fiction or fantasy world. How else could you explain all of the impossible things that happen in it?
Bart is one of the most mischievous characters I’ve ever met. There barely seems to be a single second of the day that passes by without him plotting his next funny trick.
Fred and George Weasley
If I’d written the Harry Potter series, I would have made Fred and George the protagonists of at least one of the books! They deserved more attention than they got, and I think it would have been hilarious to see all of the hijinks these brothers got into that they maybe never got around to telling Harry about.
For example, I would have loved to see the moment when they first discovered how the Marauders Map works.
Who are your favourite mischievous protagonists or other good guys?
This month I’m participating in the Scifi Month challenge that was created by the bloggers at One More. Click on the link in that last sentence for more information or to sign up yourself. There is still time to pick a few of their prompts and join in if you’re interested.
Today’s prompt is “we come in peace.” It was inspired by #WorldHelloDay, a secular holiday that encourages everyone to resolve conflict with good communication instead of by force. As soon as I began researching this holiday, I immediately thought of Star Trek.
I will only be including references to series in this universe that are no longer releasing new episodes, but there are mild spoilers in this post. It simply wasn’t possible to write this without them.
One of the things I’ve learned from watching various Star Trek series over the years is that a better world is possible. Conflicts can be resolved peacefully. It all starts with learning how to talk about what you want clearly and listening to what other people want, too.
Obviously, I can’t possibly cover every single moment of conflict resolution in Star Trek in this post without turning this into a full-length novel. What I’m hoping to do is highlight my picks for some of the best moments where Star Trek characters used words, whether spoken, written, or sung, to find a solution that worked best for everyone.
Beware of reading anything after this sentence that if you haven’t seen every old Star Trek episode yet and want to catch up without any hints about what is coming at all.
Captain Sisko’s headshot.
Series, Season, and Episode: Emissary from Season 1, episodes 1-2 of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. Although, honestly, the entire Deep Space Nine series is an amazing example of how to resolve conflict, create peace, and get along with people who may have been your enemies just a short while ago.
The Conflict: Captain Benjamin Sisko, a single father and recent widower, was dismayed by the poor condition of the space station he has just arrived to command and of the disrespectful attitudes of some of his new crew. To make matters worse, the person who assigned this posting to him was the same man he blamed for the death of his wife. In these episodes he had to decide whether to stay with Starfleet or resign and find a quiet civilian life for him and his young son.
How It Was Resolved: He had deep conversations with others who helped him acknowledge his grief and see the professional challenges lying before him in a new light. I know this is kind of a vague answer, but seeing how Captain Sisko went from despondent to hopeful was incredible. This is something everyone should experience for themselves without knowing too much in advance about how it all worked out.
Tuvok suffering from pon farr.
Series, Season, and Episode: “Body and Soul” from season 7, espisode 7 of Star Trek: Voyager.
The Conflict: Tuvok was suffering from a chemical imbalance called pon farr that was common in among Vulcans. When the medical bay’s first attempt at treatment failed, they had to resort to other ways to help Tuvok before his condition became fatal.
How It Was Resolved: Through an opera song (and then other remedies, of course).
Series, Season, and Episode: “The Menagerie” from season 1, episodes 11 and 12 of Star Trek: The Original Series.
The Conflict: The Enterprise received a distress signal from ship that had been lost eighteen years ago. When they arrived at the planet where that ship had crash landed, several members their crew was kidnapped by the people living there.
How It Was Resolved: A trial, among other creative solutions. This episode won the Hugo Award for Best Dramatic Presentation in 1967. I don’t want to give away any other plot twists, but I will say it was quite well done.
Data.
Series, Season, and Episode: “The Measure of a Man” from season 1, episode 9 of Star Trek: The Next Generation.
The Conflict: A cyberneticist named Commander Maddox wished to disassemble Data in order to understand how his artificial brain functions and reverse-engineer it to produce replicas of him for Star Fleet to use. Data refused to allow this. When he attempted to leave Star Fleet in order to save himself, a court case developed to determine whether androids should be given the same rights as humans.
How It Was Resolved: A trial. There are a lot of Star Trek episodes that involve trials, now that I think about it!
Q and Captain Picard.
Series, Season, and Episode: “Q Who” from season 2, episode 16 of Star Trek: The Next Generation.
The Conflict: There was once an omnipotent entity named Q who was so tired of seeing humans take good care of themselves that he decided to fling their spaceship 7,000 lightyears away just to see what happened next. The problem was, he threw them straight into the path of an enemy who was too powerful to defeat.
How It Was Resolved: Time travel and a large second helping of mischief. What made this episode especially great in my opinion was how much groundwork it set for future conflicts in the Star Trek universe. That’s all I’ll say about that!
If you’re a fan of Star Trek, what are your favourite scenes or episodes from it?
There are so many things I’m thankful for. For the sake of brevity, these are just a few of them.
A Soft Bed
My husband and I bought a new bed about a year ago. Before then, we slept on a mattress that was lumpy, sagging, and filled with springs that had started wandering around a little. Sometimes I’d wake up with a sore hip or back because of how a spring had poked into me. It was such a relief to have a more comfortable place to sleep again.
A Kitchen Filled with Food
Too many people don’t know where their next meal is coming from. I consider myself very lucky to always have something to eat.
Clean Clothes
Not everyone has access to this either. I’m grateful for the opportunity to change my clothes regularly and always have enough money to wash them when they get dirty.
Internet Access
I use the Internet to keep in touch with family and friends, volunteer, update my blog, borrow library books, stay current on world events, and so much more.
The WWBC Community
You’re all wonderful.
Click here to read everyone else’s replies to this week’s question. The image below is the list of upcoming prompts for this blog hop.
While I was coming up with this list, I tried to make everything fit the same sentence structure. It bothered me just a little bit that I had to break that pattern for one of my answers.
There are five genres I read less of these days and five I’ve started to spend much more time exploring.
I Read Less Poetry
I Read Less Horror
I Read Less Fantasy
I Read Less Romance
I Read Fewer Series and Long Works
I Read More Biographies
I Read More Hard Science Fiction
I Read More History
I Read More Hopeful Fiction, Scifi or Otherwise
I Read More Science
In general, I find that I’m becoming more interested in books that talk about real-life issues (even if the plots themselves are fictional) and have a faster-paced structure than what I read when I was in school. It’s also nice to find authors who take a hopeful but realistic approach to their topic, whatever that topic may be.
This isn’t to say that I dislike poetic passages or metaphors. A few of them sprinkled into a book are nice, but I’m not as thrilled about reading an entire novel’s worth of that sort of thing as I used to be.
Since I’m bisexual, I’m going to be talking about book boyfriends and book girlfriends today.
While I don’t really celebrate any winter holidays with anything other than a nice meal, I still enjoy reading books about or set in this part of the year.
I’ll admit to being the sort of person who sometimes plays conversations out in my head before they happen.
Observe
But I also believe in natural consequences and in putting emotional energy into relationships that are healthy and reciprocal. The only person I can control is myself, so there have been times in my life when I’ve reduced or eliminated the time I spent with someone based on their behaviours and current level of introspection.
This month I’m participating in the Scifi Month challenge that was created by the bloggers at 
Doesn’t this photo feel like it came from a scene in a fantasy novel? I will be talking about a fantasy series today so it does fit the theme of this post.
This week’s prompt was a Thanksgiving freebie. Since I’ve already written a few different posts about the Canadian and American Thanksgivings over the last month, I decided to use this prompt to share books written by Native American and First Nations authors that I’ve already read or am I’m hoping to read soon.
This month I’m participating in the Scifi Month challenge that was created by the bloggers at 
A Kitchen Filled with Food